I saw this on PostSecret and decided that I needed to feature it on my blog, too.
What is it about us as a society that makes us think that it’s okay to keep people in closets (in general - I know not everyone is closed-minded)? Why do we think that people should be ashamed of who they are, or afraid of being honest with the world? Who are we to foist our issues on others? Homophobia isn’t about homosexuality being wrong, it’s about straight people being closed-minded, small, and stupid.
I met someone, not too long ago, who was frightened of coming out to me. She worried that doing so would negatively affect our fledgling friendship. The relief in her voice when I told her that, hell no, her being a lesbian wouldn’t have any bearing on our relationship whatsoever, was a little surprising to me (she hadn’t yet noticed the pride flag on the back of my car).
I can’t imagine living my life in secret like that; having to hide a significant part of who I am from the people I meet, or having to decide whether it’s “safe” or not to reveal who I really am to my friends and coworkers. I never have to think twice about talking about my husband, but I would if I were talking about my wife. HOW is it different, I ask! *I* don’t think it is, but I seem to be in a minority.
This still chaps my hide, and it will every day until we figure this shit out.
Love is love: end of story.
Thanks for posting that - I love PostSecret; so often the postcards blow my mind in their anguished revelations of interior chaos.
I’m putting together content for my Critical Thinking class and I intend to have the students go to and complete the How Homophobic Are You? quiz at http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/pages/frontline/shows/assault/etc/quiz.html . I think it will provide excellent fodder for discussion.
Chili, there are many lovely things about you but your open mind is one of the loveliest.
and FABULOUS use of “Chaps my hide” ….
The deciding whether it is safe to reveal myself is something that is very hard but has gotten better with time. Well, maybe not because i just had to change my wording from “yourself” to “myself”. I mostly don’t give a hoot what people think of me except when i might loose my job or get my ass kicked. I hope i live to see a day when it is no longer an issue. Hip, hip, I’m queer!
What is sad is that so many gay and lesbians are homophobic. For example, on Fire Island this weekend, when i would walk by the men, a lot of them would not respond to my hello. I actually spoke with a very nice man who said ( and he brought up the topic ) that most of the men do not like the fact that so many lesbians come to the island. And i know a lot of woman who complain about the men. Homophobia among the Homos has got to stop.
Okay, you’ve just reminded me of an incident a couple of years ago with a colleague that I’ll need to blog about. Thank you
The real problem is that most of us straight people run our lives so purely, logically, carefully, efficiently, healthfully, sanely, and all around wonderfully that we feel a duty to complain about those folks who don’t, by our lights, run their lives so well.
Oh, what a paradise this world would be if only everyone were just like me.