Last night, during the “who are you and why are you here” section of the first evening of the Holocaust fellowship, I had an opportunity to tell a story that helped to illustrate why I feel that this week was something I was obligated to do, not only as a teacher, but also as a parent and a human being.
A few months ago, Beanie and I were in the car on our way to pick Punkin’ up from track practice. Bean was in the back seat telling me about her day, and relating a story that went something like this:
Bean: “Something bad happened in school today, Mommy”
Me: “Really? What?”
“WELL, I was sitting with Jenna at our cluster (Mommy’s note – the 3rd graders’ desks are arranged in blocks of four that are called clusters. It seems that students are rotated around the clusters during the course of the year in an effort to get each kid to sit with every other kid at least once during the school year). Adam had his backpack on his desk, and it made Jenna upset.”
“The backpack made Jenna upset? Why?”
“WELL, it wasn’t the backpack that made her upset, really; it was something that Adam had drawn on it. Jenna’s Jewish, and that’s why she was upset” she added.
That’s when I knew that this was a good story.
After a bit of complicated description involving “bendy, leggy things sticking out,” Bean had managed to get out that Adam had drawn a swastika on his bag. She then told me that she’d tried to explain to Adam why that was a bad thing to have on his bag and she asked him to erase it (it seems the symbol was done in pencil on the nylon of the bag), but he wouldn’t listen to her. Seeing that her friend was truly uncomfortable about this, Bean did what we’ve taught her to do – when she finds herself in a situation she can’t handle on her own, she goes to a trusted grown-up for help.
Bean took her teacher aside (”I didn’t tattle,” she said) and explained what was going on. Mrs. F., being the smart and kind woman that she is, used this situation as a lovely teaching opportunity. She explained to the kids that the symbol that Adam had drawn on his bag means something bad to a lot of people and, though she didn’t get into the details (couldn’t, really – it’s not on the third grade curriculum and she’d likely be inviting all KINDS of hell from parents if she snuck it in), she did explain that it was an inappropriate thing to have as a decoration on a backpack and insisted that Adam erase it.
I spoke to Mrs. F. later and she explained that the boy came upon this innocently – they’d been doing a unit of geography and the students were assigned a country to do a bit of research on. Adam drew Germany from the proverbial hat, saw the symbol in an encyclopedia entry, and thought it “looked cool;” he had no concept of the symbol or the bastardized meaning the Nazis had given it. Mrs. F. explained that it was an offensive symbol to a lot of people, and left it at that.
I, however, did not. Bean and Punkin’ and I had a long and productive conversation in the car about what that symbol really means. Once we got started, they were able to tell me, in 9 and 11 year old terms, what the Shoah was and why EVERYONE should be offended by that symbol. Their education about this era is lacking – something which I intend to remedy – but I was pleased that they got what they did.
What pleased me more, though, was Beanie’s willingness to stand up for her friend. Even though the swastika didn’t offend her – at least, not at the time – she empathized with her friend’s genuine discomfort, even if she didn’t truly understand it. I’m proud of her for doing that, and pleased that I’m raising her in an environment that encourages that kind of behavior.
THAT’S why I’m attending this fellowship.
I may not have mentioned that my Honey is Jewish. So, of course, are Daughter and Babycakes. I am sensitive to both intentional and unintentional slights against them (this started long ago with other Jewish lady companions and other folks I got to like, mostly in Miami).
I’m glad you are also sensitive to this issue, and that you are taking the seminar.
It’s a perfect story to explain the need to educate and foster understanding – that “bendy, leggy thing sticking out” represents an ideology of delusional superiority and an utter lack of humanity.
Yours will be an intense week, my friend but you’re doing something SO important. This seminar is a continuation of who you are and what you stand for and in your hands, the vital lessons of the Shoah can continue to be taught. I am so proud of you.
Again, I am amazed and truly grateful for the compassion that Beanie and Punkin’ Pie demonstrate at such a young age.
When I was their age I found a business card to some Aryan youth organization in, of all things, a book about the Holocaust. I didn’t understand the “bendy, leggy thing sticking out” but thought it looked cool. My Mom handled the situation beautifully by having me talk to the mother of one of her friends. This woman survived the Holocaust. It was an enlightening evening. But also frightening that so many years after the Holocaust, there were people like the person who left his business card in the book that still espoused such hatred and prejudice.
As an adult, I am saddened that things have not changed. Rwanda, the Sudan, Croatia, and even here in the United States (Jena, LA and the current racist attacks against Obama come to mind).
Like everything else, you handled it with your children perfectly. What is better than talking through a situation to make them understand it.
What gets me is there are people who honestly believe the Holocaust did not happen. That is was made up or something. Things like this cannot be ignored. It could happen again. To ANY group
What a perfect example of the learning and teaching that must go on. Great introduction to the whole heavy duty week.
By the way, what kind of “decompression” activities do they have planned? When I took a similar course, they always had an informally-formally discussion/decompression time in the evening to help us process the day…
fab story, and thanks for sharing. i look forward to hearing more about your week.
I am thinking about you on your training course this week. It cant be easy but sounds very worthwhile
Your kids are cool.
That’s all I can come up with since I still have tears in my eyes from the story.
Hugs and high fives to the mini-Chili’s. And to you, of course!!!
I think everyone should go through this training. After so many years, there is the tendency to want to forget.