Thought for Thursday

Mr. Chili and I celebrate 12 years of marriage on Sunday. In honor of that milestone, I offer this Thought for Thursday, attributed to Freidrich Neitzsche:

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

Are YOU lucky (or smart) enough to have married your best friend? What do you think are the essential components to a successful and enduring marriage? How do you maintain your friendships, whether in a marriage or not?



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21 responses to “Thought for Thursday

  1. Congratulations! I’m happy you married your best friend. I didn’t, exactly, but he is now. (Although he wasn’t my best friend when I married him, I knew he would be quickly. It’s as long story!)

    Our 10th anniversary is on Monday. We’re going on a 10th Anniversary trip to where we got married. I just started blogging, and I’m going to write about him for our anniversary, but we’ll be gone–without a computer–so he won’t see it. Maybe I should print it and take it with me.

    To me the essential components to a successful and enduring marriage are mutual respect and willingness to compromise. And of course, communication. I believe maintaining friendships is basically the same, but you have to add the willingness to invest time into it. In a marriage, the time is usually (not always) present just because you live in the same place. That part is a little harder with friends.

    From what I’ve seen of your blog, you have no trouble with either!

  2. The secret to maintaining a long term friendship (for me) is to remember that I am not their parent.

    That and being able to put up with bodily gaseous emissions go a long way toward harmony.

  3. We are coming up to nineteen years. I think selective deafness and a deficient memory help. And being able to spend time occasionally.(We both live and work from home!)
    I am always so pleased to see him again after a break…

  4. oops, I clicked too quickly…I meant spend time APART occasionally!

  5. Newlyweds! 🙂 Congratulations.

    Forgiveness. And an appreciation of silliness.

  6. Congratulations! We celebrated 13 years in April and are still in love, most likely because we married as friends.

  7. Congratulations! That’s no easy feat, no matter how compatible.

  8. Congratulations-and that is one right on quote.

  9. I am not sure we were best friends when we were married, but after almost 30 years of marriage, we must be something close to best friends by now.

  10. Yep I think I got that one covered.

  11. Oh and Congratulations. It is a mile stone for sure!

  12. De


    We’ll celebrate 18 years marriage later this year. I think that the friendship part can too easily drop by the wayside if a couple lets life get too busy. The problem is not that people change, it’s that their partner has a fixed image in his/her mind and doesn’t keep up to date as they live parallel lives.

  13. twoblueday

    Our secret is not getting married! Well, maybe it is the friendship thing.

  14. laughter – lots of it. 🙂

  15. Bo

    Respect. Levity. Humility.

    Best to you guys on your 12th. We’re 11 years in ourselves, and I’d marry her again immediately.

  16. My first thought when I read your post was, “wow! 12 years?! That’s a LONG time!” Then I realized that I will be married 12 years in December…. How did you (i mean we) get that old?!

  17. Congratulations! We’re at 11 and we have been best friends and crazy about each other from the start. . . with lots of hills and valleys, but the basic huge strong love is always there. He’s the best person I’ve ever met. Not that he doesn’t drive me crazy.

  18. The birthday card I gave Mr. C yesterday was all about being my best friend. He certainly is.

  19. Happy Anniversary, Mr & Mrs. Chili.

  20. Congratulations, Chilis!

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